Two Plus Two is Fish
by Sulky Shadow
Summary: Roxas never claimed to be good with numbers, but this was just ridiculous.


**Disclaimer:** I do not own Kingdom Hearts. All characters go to their respectful owners. I only own this story.

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><p><strong>Two Plus Two is Fish<strong>

Roxas was watching the sun set on the clock tower when Axel arrived.

"Sorry I'm late," Axel apologized, while handing his friend some sea-salt ice cream.

Roxas remained quiet as he took the treat from Axel and resumed his gazing at the falling ball of fire.

The silence stretched out for several minutes, and it began to make Axel feel a bit uncomfortable. "You're not mad with me, are ya?" he asked eventually.

Silence.

"I said I was sorry…" Axel said nervously, as he watched the untouched ice cream begin to melt and fall down to the waiting ground, far below.

More silence.

"Roxas?" Axel tapped his friend's shoulder.

Roxas jumped. "Sorry, what?" he asked, embarrassed.

"Nothing, you just weren't answering is all."

"Oh," Roxas was quiet for a moment. "Axel, if Two's company and Three's a crowd, then what am I?" he asked.

"What?" Axel was accustomed to his friend's unique personality and view on things—especially when it came to the question of Nobodies feeling emotions. But this question was strange, even for him.

"If Xigbar is company and Xaldin is a crowd, then what am I?" Roxas repeated.

"Where do Xig and Xaldin come into this?"

"Xigbar is number two, and Xaldin is number three," Roxas explained.

Axel thought to himself for a minute and then burst out laughing. "Roxas," he said, trying to catch his breath, "it's not about the Organization, it's about people in general."

"In general?"

"It means having two people together is company, while having three people together is a crowd."

"Oh, that makes sense…I think."

Axel ruffled his friend's hair. "Don't worry about it, buddy. It doesn't matter."

"Okay," Roxas was quiet for a while. "So what about the rest of them?"

"The rest of them?"

"Of the Organization," Roxas explained. "We know what Xigbar and Xaldin are, so what about the rest of them?"

"Haven't we already established that it doesn't involve the Organization, Roxas?"

"Yes, but I want to know your opinion."

"Alrighty…" Axel thought for a moment. "Whom do you want me to tell you about first?"

"Let's just go in order. Starting with Xemnas."

"Okey dokey. Let's see…one is lonely," Axel said.

"Because you're by yourself?" Roxas asked.

"Yeah, all he has for company is Kingdom Hearts."

Roxas nodded sadly. "I wonder how many friends he had before he became a Nobody," he wondered out loud.

"Well I'm sure number Two kept him company. They did work together when they were Somebodies," Axel explained.

Roxas looked up at his friend. "Really? I'm glad."

"Okay, Mr. Mushy pants, let's move on," Axel chuckled.

Roxas smiled. "Sorry. So…Vexen, right?"

"Mr. Snow Cone himself…four kills the mood."

"You got that right. All he ever does is talk about how great his experiments are coming along. If you ask me, Vexen just doesn't want to do recon," Roxas laughed.

Axel snorted.

"Right, so…Lexaeus is next."

Axel was quiet for a while. "Well to be quite honest, I think a group of five is just awkward. It's too quiet," he explained.

Roxas nodded in agreement. "True. Zexion?"

"Six is just strange, all he does is read that book of his. What is it, porn?" Axel joked.

"What's porn?" Roxas asked.

"Uhh…well, erm…we've gotten off topic. Saix is next, right? Seven can be a bit intimidating sometimes. The scar on his face just screams 'back away from me, _now_'," Axel chuckled.

Roxas shuddered. "I wonder why he has that." He shook his head. "Demyx?"

"Nine people in one group, huh? That's frightening. Which is really rather ironic if you think about it."

"Why's that?"

"'Cause Demy is such a pansy," Axel explained.

"There's a difference between being a pansy and being a pacifist," Roxas corrected.

"And he's both!" Axel cackled.

"Okay, Axel. Let's move on to Luxord."

Axel wiped his eyes. "Having ten together is a gamble if you ask me," he said, snickering.

"Oh, ha ha. Very funny, Axel," Roxas replied, sarcastically.

"What? I thought it was pretty good," Axel said, defensively.

Roxas shook his head. "I'm sure you did. Marluxia's next."

"Being with eleven will never end well, trust me."

"Why's that?"

Axel stared at him. "Roxas, he tried to take over the Organization. And I don't know if you know this, but Marluxia has been wiped from the face of the planet."

Roxas looked down. "I knew that," he said, sheepishly.

"Larxene is next if I'm remembering correctly," Axel said, after a bit of awkward silence.

Roxas kept his head down and said nothing.

"Right…hmm….twelve is just asking for a fight."

"I don't even think you would be able to register that you were fighting with Larxene before she struck you down. Literally and metaphorically," Roxas joked quietly.

Axel snickered. "I can't argue with ya there, buddy."

"And what about me?" Roxas asked, looking up.

Axel was quiet for so long, Roxas was had begun to worry his friend hadn't heard him. "When you're with thirteen, you know you're gonna have a good time," he finally said, smiling at Roxas.

Roxas smiled back. "Thanks, Axel."

"Whelp, that's everyone," Axel said, leaning back and stretching.

"No, you forgot to tell me what a group of eight is like."

"Me?" Axel asked. "That's easy," he laughed, "I'm awesome."

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